Table of Contents

(Last updated May 8, 2017)

Children Raised in Polyamorous Relationships

    1. Random Babble Post – For the Children
    2. Polyamory and Children: Where is the Research At?
  1. Polyamory and Children: Opening up?
  2. Telling Your Children about Polyamory
  3. Polyamory and Children: Introducing New SOs
  4. Polyamory and Children: Research Update
  5. Polyamory and Children: Legal Stuff
  6. Polyamory and Children: What do I call Mom’s Boyfriend?
  7. Polyamory and Children Guest Blog: Marmoset, Metamour and Ice Cream
  8. Polyamory Hurts Kids? Not in the Real World
  9. Laws and legal practices affecting our children
  10. Polyamory and Children: Child Custody Review
  11. Child Custody and Polyamory: Who is at Risk
  12. Child Custody Cases: How to Protect Yourself
  13. Resources for Custody Cases Involving Polyamory
  14. Introducing Your Polyamory Partners to Your Children
  15. Should You Tell Your Kids About Polyamory?
  16. Helping Our Kids Talk About Polyamory
  17. Talking with Your Child’s Teacher (or other professional) about Polyamory
  18. When Your Kids Discover Your Closeted Polyamorous Relationship
  19. Legal Options for Multi-Parent Polyamorous Families
  20. Polyamory and Child Custody (Guest Post by Gracie X)
  21. When Our Kids Face Discrimination for Our Relationships
  22. Meeting Other Polyamorous Families
  23. Raising Children in A Polyamorous Family Wrap Up

Explaining Polyamory

  1. The Culture Gap
  2. Preparation
  3. The Conversation
  4. Positive Reactions
  5. Negative Reactions
  6. The Wrap Up

Laws Impacting Polyamory

  1. Polygamy and Marriage
  2. Family Names: Legal Stuff
  3. Polyamory Legal Challenges
  4. Laws affecting non-monogamy: bigamy, fornication, adultery, etc
  5. Laws affecting where we can live: health codes and zoning laws
  6. Laws and legal practices affecting our children: custody laws and child protective services, paternity laws, etc
  7. Laws and legal practices affecting our work: anti-discrimination laws (or the lack of them)
  8. Laws impacting our finances: inheritance law, joint property law, corporate law
  9. Laws and legal practices impacting our health: insurance law, privacy laws, hospital rules and regulations, medical power of attorney
  10. Legal Challenges to Polyamory Wrap Up

US State Laws

  1. Legal Status of Polygamy/Bigamy: United States A-G
  2. Legal Status of Polygamy/Bigamy: US H-L
  3. Legal Status of Polygamy/Bigamy: US M
  4. Legal Status of Polygamy/Bigamy: US N-Ne

Polyamory Books and Book Reviews

  1. The Polyamorists Next Door, by Dr. Eli Sheff
  2. Raf and the Robots
  3. The Husband Swap
  4. The Game Changer by Franklin Veaux
  5. Lesbian Polyamory Fic/Pics
  6. Poly Gay Fic
  7. Trans Poly Fic/Pics
  8. Stories from the Polycule, edited by Dr. Eli Sheff
  9. Designer Relationships by Mark A. Michael and Patricia Johnson
  10. Ask Me About Polyamory: The Best of Kimchi Cuddles, by Tikva Wolf
  11. Minority Representation in Polyamory Fics and Pics
  12. Polyamory Fic with Black Characters
  13. Polyamory Fics with Hispanic Characters
  14. Polyamory Fics with Asian Characters


  1. Polyamory and Pregnancy – the introduction
  2. Planning for a Pregnancy
  3. Prenatal Care – dealing with doctors and hospitals (you might also want to check out Educating Poly-Friendly Professionals)
  4. Legal Stuff – filling out the birth certificate and determining paternity
  5. Picking Names – who is involved and how do you decide
  6. Poly Partners getting pregnant
  7. What Makes a Parent – being a parent can be much more then biology
  8. Taking a Break–  sometimes, taking a break from polyamory to focus on pregnancy and a new child may be the right thing

STIs and Safe Sex

  1. STDs/STIs
  2. What are STD/STIs?
  3. STD/STIs Protection (Introduction)
  4. Protecting Against STD/STIs: Barrier Method
  5. Preventing STD/STIs: Testing Agreements
  6. Preventing STD/STIs: Be a Smart Slut – Open Relationships, Promiscuity and STD/STIs
  7. Protecting Against STD/STIs: Abstinence/Closed Relationships
  8. STD/STI Testing: Introduction
  9. Polyamory and STD/STIs: Getting Tested
  10. What Does STD/STI Testing Involve?
  11. STD/STIs: How often should I get tested?
  12. The Long List of STD/STIs
    1. Bacterial Vaginosis
    2. Chancroid
    3. Chlamydia
    4. Crab lice
    5. Cytomegalovirus (CMV)
    6. Genital Warts
    7. Granuloma Inguinale
    8. Gonorrhea
    9. Hepatitis (A, B & E)
    10. Herpes (1 & 2)
    11. HIV & AIDS
    12. Human Papillomavirus (HPV)
    13. Molluscum Contagiosum
    14. Pelvic Inflammatory Disease (PID)
    15. Pubic Lice (Crabs)
    16. Scabies
    17. Syphilis
    18. Trichomoniasis (Trich)
  13. Fluid Bonding and Safe Sex
  14. Safe Sex Vs Safer Sex
  15. HIV PrEP: Truvada
  16. Zika Virus: A New STI
  17. Everyone’s Safe Sex Definition Is Different
  18. Defining Safe Sex
  19. Safe Sex and STI Wrap Up

Mental Illness

  1. Polyamory and Mental Illness (Guest post by Clementine Morgan)
  2. Facts About Mental Illness for Poly Partners
  3. Opening Up About Mental Illness
  4. How Can I Support my Mentally Ill Poly Partner? (Part 1)
  5. How Can I Support my Mentally Ill Poly Partner? (Part 2)
  6. A Rant: “I Know I am Being Irrational Right Now”
  7. When Polyamory and Mental Illness Collide (Part 1)
  8. Living With Depression
  9. Polyamory Advice for the Mentally Ill: “Be with Your Emotions”
  10. Depressive Disorders and Polyamory
  11. Polyamory Advice for the Mentally Ill: “Communicate, Communicate, Communicate”
  12. Polyamory Boundaries and Mental Illness
  13. Living with Anxiety
  14. Anxiety Disorders and Polyamory
  15. Mental Illness: The Course of Treatment
    1. Recognizing Your Need Help
    2. Getting a Diagnosis
    3. Treatment Options
      1. Medication
      2. Talk Therapy
      3. Alternative Therapies
      4. Alternative Medicine
      5. Home Care
      6. Treatment Intensity
        1. Treatment Intensity and the Impact on Polyamory
    4. The Treatment Roller Coaster
  16. Fucked Up Parts of Mental Illness: Punishing Myself for Having Fun
  17. The Wrong Diagnosis (Guest Post by Michon Neal)
  18. Polyamory and PTSD (and other trauma and stress-related disorders) (Part 1)
  19. Polyamory and PTSD (and other trauma and stress-related disorders) (Part 2)
  20. Polyamory and Mental Illness Part II
  21. Polyamory and Mental Illness Recap
  22. Poly Advice for the Mentally Ill: “Set Clear Boundaries and Expectations”
  23. Poly Advice for the Mentally Ill: “You Control Your Emotions”
  24. Poly Advice for the Mentally Ill: You Need Talk about Problems
  25. Your Polycule Isn’t Your Relationship Counselor
  26. Poly Advice for the Mentally Ill: Avoid the Drama Triangle
  27. Polyamory, Schizophrenia, and other psychotic disorders (Part 1)
  28. Polyamory and Psychotic Disorders, Part 2
  29. The Impact of Executive Dysfunction on Relationships
  30. Polyamory and Psychotic Disorders, Part 3
  31. Poly Advice for the Mentally Ill: Use Direct Communication
  32. Mental Illness and Dating for Polyamorous Folk
  33. Mental Illness and Dating for Polyamorous Folk, Part II
  34. Mental Illness and Dating for Polyamorous Folk Part 3


  1. Abuse in Polyamory
  2. What is Abuse?
  3. Types of Abuse
  4. “There’s no right way to do polyamory!” (But there’re lots of wrong ways)
  5. Abuse, Boundaries, and Incompatibilities in Mono/Poly Relationships
  6. Roots of Abuse: Intent, Insecurity, and Shitty Boundaries
  7. Living with an Abusive Metamour (Guest Post by Liz Gentry)
  8. Abuse and Mental Illness
  9. Abuse Isn’t the Only Wrong Way to do Polyamory
  10. When Your Partner Is in an Abusive Relationship
  11. When Polyamory Triggers Abuse
  12. When polyamory is a tool for abuse
  13. Am I Abusing my Polyamorous Partners?
  14. Salvaging an Abusive Relationship
  15. Surviving an Abusive Relationship
  16. Abuse in Polyamory Wrap Up


  1. The Polyamory Etiquette Guide
  2. The Building Blocks of Polyamory Etiquette
  3. The First Rule of Polyamory Etiquette: Don’t Be Afraid to Ask
  4. Introducing Your Polyamory Partners and Metamours
  5. The Etiquette of Unexpected Encounters
    1. Running into a Poly Partner in Public
    2. Bumping into Your Metamour
    3. Meeting Family About Town
  6. Etiquette for Polyamory Partners and Children
  7. Polyamory Etiquette: Let’s Talk Invitations
  8. Formal Invitations for Poly Folk
  9. Polyamory Etiquette: Informal Invitations
  10. Telling a Date You Are Polyamorous
  11. Introductions in Polyamorous Relationships
  12. Introducing Your Polyamorous Partners to Each Other
  13. Meeting Your Metamour
  14. Metamours and “Disrespecting the Primary”
  15. Kitchen Table Polyamory, Parallel Polyamory, and Etiquette
  16. Managing Parallel Polyamory
  17. What Does Respect Mean in Polyamory?

Finances and Budgeting

  1. Polyamory Finances Blog Series
  2. Financial Entwinement
  3. Polyamory: Who Pays for Dates?
  4. Budgeting for Dates
  5. Polyamory Budgeting
  6. Guest Post: How Separate Bank Accounts Helped Make Our Open Marriage Work
  7. Budgeting with a House Spouse
  8. Two Things a Poly Group Home Needs to Save For

Polyamory on Purpose Guides

  1. The Polyamorous Home First Review
  2. The Polyamorous Home out in ebook!
  3. The Polyamorous Home, now in paperback!
  4. Safer Sex for the Non-Monogamous, Blog Hiatus, and Personal Stuff

Uncategorized Posts

  1. From Now On, I’m Saying “Polyam”
  2. Welcome Michon Neal to Polyamory on Purpose!
  3. Educating Polyamory Friendly Professionals
  4. Moving In Together
  5. Family Name – Decisions, Decisions
  6. Partner Preferences
  7. When Communication is a Bad Thing
  8. A Personal Digression: Custody Case
  9. Yay Life Insanity! (And Canadian Court Cases)
  10. More Personal Stuff (and some resources)

6 thoughts on “Table of Contents

    1. I’m sorry, Lea. I can offer tools and resources, some long distance support. But a superhero I am not. The only thing that can save a relationship is if everyone in the relationship is willing to honestly do the work to rebuild it. And sometimes even that doesn’t work.

      I hope, whether you stay in your current relationship or strike out on your own, that you are able to find happiness and satisfaction with your life and the people in it.


  1. One question I don’t see answered anywhere involves caring for a terminally ill parent while in a poly relationship. Do you have any comments/resources specifically for that? Thanks!

    1. Leo,

      I’m afraid this is a question I can’t address right now. I’ll try to get back to you with other resources in a couple of days, but your best bet may be one of the polyam forums. I’m found /r/polyamory and to both have helpful communities with knowledgeable people.

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